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Showing posts with label Sundays. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Sundays. Show all posts

Sunday, October 23, 2011

Sunday, today..

Sunday, the day of rest?

I am laughing as it really isn't, not for me and not for a lot of folks. I used to work it, for years and years. Now, being unemployed, I find that housework, cooking, children/puppies, facebooking, napping, laundry, take up a lot of time. The bonus with Sundays is I get lower electric rates all day and most places are closed. No making doctor appointments or going to the bank, post office or library. I also try to avoid shopping or eating out on week-ends. Not only because rates are higher at say movie theaters, but to avoid crowds,too. I really dislike masses of people and traffic.

No, I don't go to church. Not on Sundays or any other day. I don't belong to a church. I honor God, every day by how I act. Some moments I am good, others, no. I do not expect perfection, would be terrified to achieve it. That is a very scary thought. LOL, I just try to be better. Better than I was yesterday, more patient with my kids, a bit more motivated with my chores. Bringing some smiles, prayers or comfort to my friends. Raising the bar of how I think about things. I have been slacking.

It isn't a sin, but I have been reacting instead of living with a purpose. I have been letting my emotions, past issues, present troubles, and mental turmoil push me around. I can't say that this won't be an issue again. Today, no. Enough already. Good Grief!

I would have liked more fun today. Oh well, I really am glad my kids go to school tomorrow, all day. Funny, I will miss them too, until they get home. I feel bad that my hubby is so far away and working so hard. This isn't my fault or his, it wasn't what we were promised moving out here. Now we are moving again for a better solution for us all. I am keeping my fingers crossed..and that is a prayer I include for myself.

I would really like to feel better, physically. I am having another hot flash..ugh. I am already one step closer to my New Year's resolutions. I quit smoking and I am trying to change the world, starting with myself. It is what I have. My obsessions haven't died. I still feel the pull of my addictions. My stalkee that I had blocked is still a part of my computer family. I feel a mess of emotions about that. Logically, it is one of the stupidest things I have ever done. I wish I could walk away from it forever. I am hoping maybe I can, but then again maybe that isn't what I am supposed to be doing. When I pray about this all I feel is incredible sadness.

My friend I talk to daily, has had so much patience and goodwill. My hubby, who I also talk to daily, has done his best to accommodate anything I might need. One way or another. There are many reasons I love him and have stayed with him so long. We have more challenges facing us. One step at a time.

I am really tired now, which isn't surprising. It has been a long day. G'night or G'morning to you all wherever you may be. Thanks for listening. TTYAL.


the video is the wrong one, but can't figure out yet how to remove it..LOL That's Jack, the puppy.

"I hope I never get everything I want, life is boring without having desire and anticipation. But I hope someday I realize I have everything I need, life is sad without feeling content and appreciation." Patrick Bagdon





Sunday, July 24, 2011

don't forget to breathe..

"It is just another day..another day in paradise?" not quite. It isn't complete hell either. I just really am not excited about Sundays. Never ever liked them as a kid.  I worked most of them as an adult. Now, they just seem like a big, pointless nap day where stores close at weird hours and you have to watch what roads you take at what hours. You don't want to get stuck behind the "faithful" all leaving at the same time. When school starts for my kids, it is the night "BEFORE". Their stuff has to be ready for the next day.

I have quit smoking?  I HAVE QUIT SMOKING! It has been since last Tuesday. Yes, I did have a personal session with a hypnotherapist. This has not been a magical cure, more of an exercise of despair. Mornings are very hard, I can't seem to wake-up yet. Shazbot! I have different breathing techniques and I chew on a lot of straws. I also have a list of my top ten reasons to quit smoking. For anyone who knows me or has known me.. I have been at the minimum a 2 pack a day smoker since I was 13. My kids are very excited and helpful with this. You got to love them. They also have a visualization exercise they do with me. I suppose I will get over feeling so dizzy and tired. I hope soon.

I also hope to get the results of my blood work and pee test back this week. I want to just schedule the hernia surgery as soon as possible and get it over with. I am so tired of the back and forth. Hurry up and wait and all the lovely bills that have been arriving. Aaarrgh. If these last medical tests haven't shined some light on my "medical mystery Zebra status" I am done. I can't afford to invest any more money, time, or effort. It will be just time to deal with what is.

Abby update..I guess she is home and doing very well with her feeding tube. I have since heard she is a little over 2 months old and originally had less than a 25% chance of living when she was born. Go baby girl, my heart just smiles thinking of her.

Okay, I know I haven't written much, but I am exhausted. It has been a very rough week for me in more ways than one.
MY TOP TEN REASONS TO BE A NON-SMOKER:


  1. Never have to buy smokes again, ever.(cost and hassle)
  2. Have my time and energy for me, not smoking.
  3. Breathe
  4. Feel better
  5. Smell better
  6. Have control
  7. Stay alive longer
  8. Make me happy to succeed.
  9. Make my kids, hubby, friends very happy
  10. I said I would, somehow.


I did cheat this morning and had a drag from an e-cigarette. It isn't the end of the world but back to pretzels and straws. Good luck and TTYAL..got to go.

I'll get some energy soon and write some more..yawn! love ya!





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