The Next Level: Hello..

My kids were off school today and I got absolutely nothing done. I would love to blame it on them, but it wasn't their fault. I did not feel like doing a d**n thing at all. Nope, nada, nil, zero, ziltch..I didn't even particularly want to wake up but did. President's Day, I told my son it was a holiday only for bank employees, kids and postal/government workers. I would count teachers too, but they bring work home all the time.

It wasn't a very exciting day. We did end up going out for lunch, but even that was a sort of blah. I didn't eat very healthy. I haven't been eating much either. All foods and drinks are giving me heartburn. I have been in the doldrums for about a week? Even when my hubby was home I wasn't motivated. I was sick then, and my non-existent hernia problem were giving me grief. But, I have rooted to my couch and become a potato, that is when I am not asleep or napping.

This is not good.

I have done as minimal as I am able to do. I feed the dog and treat him, but haven't walked him in days. I have been zoning out on Facebook and playing solitaire or doing suduko puzzles. I ignore my kids and dog as much as I can. Even bored out of my mind, I stare out at oblivion. I realize I don't want to think. I want to be numb. Why? Or maybe I should ask why not? Going around backwards to find the answer, there may not be one. Hmm..ok.

I have decided that I am in a rest state. I am digesting information and need a respite. Yeah, okay..that sounds better than just being lazy or zombified. It is too a word, spell-checker..hmph. lol.

Tomorrow? I will get up and get motivated and, and..at least I am still taking showers and I haven't planned anything subversive. I am not a una-bomber. That would take too much effort. I am keeping this light and a bit silly. I do not want to think or dwell on deep heavy thoughts or ponder. This is about just enjoying hugs, puppies and fluffy clouds. (This was a post in my Facebook). I guess this is what the anti-depressants are supposed to do.

I don't know. I am still new to this. I still get shaky at times, but it is getting better. I think. I haven't been taking on very many challenges either. I need to go try to get some sleep and will re-read this in the morning, hmm. I should include a picture, quote or song here. All I can hear is the pool filter and my lap-top humming right now. The puppy isn't even snoring.

My title today, Hello? The polite conversations we have.

" Hello! How are you doing?"

"Oh, hi! I have been great, it sure has been a while. How are things going with you?"

"Just fine, really, everything is good..we should talk more often and you look great."

"Thanks, you are so sweet., you too..and yes, we should get together way more. Got to run now, you know."

"Don't I know it, busy... busy... busy"

"See ya"

"yep, see ya..this was sweet, bye"

"bye"

Whatever..we don't say a damn thing which is better than nothing but what? I am not even sure what I am saying here. I want more. I want more connection, more reality, more content even if it burns. LOL-WOW zinger. TTYAL and have a marvellous day. Thanks for listening.